BOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

Well, I'm leaving for France soon. Tonight. I just want you to know, I'll be missing you every single day I'm gone.

Freaking sick.. -_- Darn flu.

Starting to hate idiots taking advantage of me.

Sick of the gnawing pain in the hole in my heart.. Sick of missing you.. Sick of this unrequited love..

The pain of missing you leaves a constant hole in my heart, eternally stabbing in my time-torn heart.

Not loving you is harder then you know..

A tough life choice to make. To go back to Queenstown Secondary, my least liked school of all time, to do F&N and 2-3 other subjects or to try MDIS to further my studies as a private candidate and do subjects I don't really enjoy? Hm, decisions.. Anyone willing to lend some advice or at least a listening ear? Which I doubt anyone will but whatever.

What Can I Say-Dead By April

I tried to be all that you need
tried not ever let you down
still I can see it in your eyes
Not good enough

(This time I believed that I really could change)
(I gave it all)
(This time you really had my everything)
(I guess I was wrong)
I guess I was wrong

What can I say, What can I do
This is who I am and I am hurting you
What can I say, what can I do
No matter how strong my feelings are
I always end up hurting you

I always end up hurting you
I'm hurting you

I tried hard only to be him
You've always wanted in life
Still I just bring you misery
(What can I do)

(This time I believed in you, in me)
(When I gave it all)
(This time I could see it all perfectly,)
(I guess I was wrong)
I guess I was wrong

What can I say, what can I do
This is who I am and I am hurting you
What can I say, what can I do
No matter how strong my feelings are
I always end up hurting you
I always end up hurting you

Without you I am crying
With you I am just hurting you

Without you I am dying
With you I am tearing your heart

(Without you I am crying)
(Without you I am dying)

What can I say, What can I do
This is who I am and I'm hurting you
What can I say, what can I do
No matter how strong my feelings are
I always end up hurting you
I always end up hurting you
I always end up hurting you

Well hey guys. I'm here to do a random post of the day. Nothing better to do so ima post. Sorry readers, I know that this post is a bit overdue so I'm going to make it as detailed as possible.

Well, English O Levels was pretty manageable thanks to Language Alive Pte Ltd. It's basically an English tutoring session I guess. We did plenty of English practices such as Comprehension, Summary vocabulary replacement words, Summary practice and composition practice. It was kinda fun but hectic for me. There was one chiobu there called Sylvia. I also talked to 1 ex gangster and his friend there(wow?! ASTONISHING!!!). They told me about some gangster group called 123 in hokkien. I don't want to mention anymore for fear of the risk of them coming to hantam me lol.

As for Maths 'O' Levels, it was hell. I hope I can at least get a pass in it. -_- Uncle Geoffrey didn't give me enough practice for it and explained too much. He didn't give me enough practice of the Trigonometry, Angles of a circle or whatever you call it, number patterns and other various topics that were my main weak points for Maths. . Looks like my Mom and Dad wasted all that money for nothing.. Fail aye? Lol..

Anyway, I also went out with CY twice to Kinnikuniya to get Ultimate Spiderman comic books. On one occasion, we met at Bishan to eat Pepper's Lunch. We then took the MRT to Orchard and we bought the book. I showed off my pair of Razer Moray+ to him. I paid for him on one occasion but he still has not returned me the cash for it. Nevermind, I'm chasing him for it now. Anyway, I had to listen to music at Bishan for 1 hour to wait for him. His excuse was that the teacher delayed the class. For like 10-15mins I can understand. But for one whole freaking hour?! That's retarded. Lol. Anyway, we caught up with each other there.

My medicine also got changed from 15mg of Olanzapine Zyprexa to 5mg of Olanzapine and 1mg of Risperidone. The reason why we changed it is because the old medicine made me very drowsy and sedated in the morning and also because it made my appetite increase. Well, the new dosage may seem small in comparison but it is a bit lower dosage than normal for the new medicine. The old medicine will help to compensate for the low dosage. My Dad and I also forgot to ask for sleeping pills. -_- Fail.

So what am I looking forward to? Well, on Monday, I have a NS doctor's appointment. In addition, I may also be taking up some cooking or baking classes. Furthermore, I have a new deynition service at Trinity Church tomorrow! Last but not least, I'm going for a skiing trip to France and then to the UK to meet up with my sister! As some of you readers may know, my sister went overseas to the UK to study in Oxford University. Bad ass right? Well, be sure to look out for that post readers!

That's all I wanted to post. Bye and be sure to keep reading! :)

See Me Smiling-Yellowcard

The sun comes up and you are all over my mind
You're in my brain before I can open my eyes
As I go on without you
My heartbeat wont slow down
I need you back like I need air to breath this out

All I can do is keep you closer now
'Cause I know your somewhere out there looking down
Wherever you are (Wherever you are)
I hope you can see me smiling

The sky gets dark, I watch the water here at home
It's 10 years now and I'm still learning to let go
I'ts not the same without you
Theres no one keeping time
You were the rhythm that was bringing us to life

All I can do is keep you closer now
'Cause I know you're somewhere out there looking down
Wherever you are (Wherever you are)
I hope you can see me smiling now (I hope you can see me smiling)

Sometimes I can't help think that I have you right behind me all this time
If only you could have a chance to see
All the happiness you gave to me

All I can do is keep you closer now
'Cause I know you're somewhere out there looking down
Wherever you are
I hope you can see me smiling now (I hope you can see me smiling)
I hope you can see me smiling

How could this happen to me
I made my mistakes
I’ve got no where to run
The night goes on
As I’m fading away
I’m sick of this life
I just wanna scream
How could this happen to me

SFWC TOMORROW! WHOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOO! :)

Burdened by problems, last to know.

Let's see you move on from someone you really love. /end scarasm